Mirrors used to scare me. As I walked past, I never knew who would show up. The good witch {I like to picture myself as Glinda from the Wizard of Oz} or the bad witch? Unfortunately, the bad mean ugly witch showed up 98% of the time. She enjoyed letting me know my hair didn’t look quite right or how the brownie I ate really did go directly to my thighs. It was a never ending banter of body part put downs.
This began in high school when I weighed 115 lbs. on a 5’2″ frame and continued into adulthood when my weight reached a high of 137.
It affected the clothes I wore because I needed to cover up the less than desirable parts of my body. It affected my relationships, sex with the lights on? No way! It even affected how I sat in chairs.
I said things to my beautiful body I would never say out loud. I was a bully to ME. I was miserable and had no idea how to stop.
Internally, I was the general of a war within me. Externally, I put on a really good show.
I started going to a yoga class. I quickly realized how disconnected I was to my body. By being quiet, I learned more about what I wanted in life and what I needed. Yoga introduced me to myself. The part of me that was hiding from all the nastiness.
Then one day, this simple sentence that I heard several times before from my yoga teacher clicked in my head. I was free.
“You are complete yet unfinished.”
In my head I heard the loud battle cry, “I AM complete.” I felt lighter a weight was lifted. There was no reason to put myself down because I AM complete.
I began to focus on what I loved about myself. This was not easy, but I kept repeating my new mantra when things were difficult. It took years, but I slowly let all the negativity go replacing it with encouragement. This is something I still work on. I promise you, it gets easier over time.
Once that happened, other things began shifting in my life. My yoga business started to flourish. I finally made the decisions I wanted to make a long time ago. In my heart, I knew there was more work for me to do. I wanted to help women change their lives. I was certified to be a life coach and I began coaching amazing women.
I’ve learned that it’s the simple things that can have the most profound impact on your life, like that short sentence, I am complete, yet unfinished. The greatest amount of change comes when we make a shift to the little things we do every day.
By slowly learning to love myself, I felt a joy that trickled into everything I did.
For me, loving myself started with the daily internal dialog, but loving yourself also includes:
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The ability to take a break when you need one
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Being in a healthy relationship
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Not letting excuses run your life
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Enjoying the work you do
The best part about loving yourself is how it can profoundly change your life. Here are 7 ways loving yourself can change your life.
1. Create a deeper connection to your intuition
Loving yourself connects you to your intuition. You can hear the callings of your soul more clearly and act on it. Intuition is a beautiful thing. When connected to it, you feel the next step, take action, and make choices based on your needs to move you forward in all areas of your life.
2. Show up and be present
Love and acceptance go hand in hand. When you accept every part of you, you can show up, shine brightly and be present.
What does this look like? You can be yourself. You can stop putting on a show or hiding your true feelings. You can be unapologetically yourself.
3. Enhance all your relationships
When you love yourself, you have the capacity to love others. You can fully show up for the people you love and experience deep meaningful relationships that are supportive and nurturing.
You’ll also recognize much more quickly when you need to let go of unhealthy relationships.
4. Walk with confidence
Loving yourself creates a bounce in your step. You walk tall and own your awesomeness. Did you know that a study from the International Journal of Cosmetic Science showed that confidence can be more important romantically than attractiveness? Having confidence might just lead you to your life partner.
5. You can communicate your needs
Yes and no are two very powerful words. When you love yourself, you say yes to the things you want to do and no to the things you don’t. You’ll find the courage to express your needs. Love doesn’t mix signals.
6. Find freedom
Love knows no boundaries. Freedom comes when you completely accept and honor yourself on every level. When you let go of what other people think, your fears fall away and freedom emerges.
7. Naturally create time for yourself
When you love yourself, you honor time for relaxation and rejuvenation. You easily fit it into your schedule because its important to you. Bonus: click here for 15 soothing and relaxing songs that are perfect for “me” time.
This is not about loving an idea of what your life should look like. It’s about loving yourself as you are right now.
There’s no judgement. Judgement only exists when you create it.
You have to start somewhere. Is your life messy? Love the mess. Love your muffin top, saggy buttocks and scars. Love the image you see in the mirror.
Is this easy? I’m not going to lie to you and say it is. It’s not easy. Is it worth it? I think it is. I believe we all can love ourselves a little more.
Start today. Love yourself. It will change your life.
